Today I am participating in a weekly feature on lisajobaker.com called Five Minute Fridays. Bloggers are given a writing prompt (topic) and told to write for *five minutes. “No *editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.” Today’s topic is “Afraid.”
Nah…I’m not doing that one.
But a few moments later, I heard another voice:
What are you so afraid of? You are afraid of admitting to the world that you are afraid.
I took that as a challenge really.
And so, in spite of all my dreams and hopes that the future is going to be great and awesome and wonderful and God has a plan and yadayadayada…
Yes, I still have moments where I am utterly terrified of life after the Army. Of unemployment. Of lower pay. Of less money in the bank.
I’m afraid of paying for health insurance.
I’m afraid of moving, starting all over, leaving our church that we are just starting to feel comfortable. Leaving friends. Trying to break into a new group again.
Sometimes, the terror is so strong that I can’t breathe.
But then this verse comes to mind that goes something like this:
What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee.
And I guess that it’s the TRUST that pushes aside the fear, sweeps it under the rug, and says “no…you aren’t going to win today.”
Because I know that my God is bigger than everything I’m afraid of. And He will see me through it all. It sounds so cliche. But it’s what I’m holding onto in those moments when I’m…