16 Comments

  1. Karen

    Thank you so much for this! I formula fed all four of my children who are all healthy, highly-educated, working adults.
    Had I continued to try breastfeeding… I likely would have suffered severe ppd. Instead, I was able to enjoy my babies, take care of myself and my older children, have a relationship with my husband (who also got to have a closer relationship with his children through sharing the feedings), and everyone was well-fed.
    I recently lost a close friendship with a woman who invested all of her self-esteem and identity into being a breastfeeding, attachment-parenting, la leche leader, type of mom. The ironic thing is that we are both now in our 50s! She just couldn’t stand that I believe that breastfeeding “benefits” are negligible in a first world country. I would not agree that her way was superior to mine and I lost the friendship.
    So glad you are taking care of yourself and able to enjoy being a mommy!

  2. Ruth

    I don’t think it was just a coincidence that I found your blog. It was divine intervention. I’m not at a place right now where self care is even possible for various reasons. However, your writing has been a blessing.
    I could have written this post and many others I have read. You mentioned before your heart was with military ministry. Well, I’m a military spouse in the trenches of military life. Struggling every day. Thank you for your ministry, for sharing from your heart. May God bless you.

  3. Thank you for posting this!!!!! I chose to formula feed my son from birth. I didn’t try to breast feed at all. I didn’t want to. The thought of it gave me the heebie jeebies. I also have Asperger’s and I was worried about my sensory issues and didn’t want to feel any resentment towards my son. I did, however, try to pump in an attempt to feed my son at least SOME breast milk, but the feeling of the pump attached to me made my skin crawl and it took all my self control not to throw the damn thing across the room.

    Nevertheless, my son is now nearly 13 months old and is growing beautifully. He has reached all his milestones early. He has NEVER been sick; not so much as a runny nose. Personally, I lost all my baby weight and then some without doing all that much exercise within 6 months. I didn’t have any postpartum depression either.

    I feel the benefits of breast feeding are grossly over-exaggerated. All that matters is that a baby is fed, cared for and loved.

    • I am using formula because of my exhaustion levels and my need to focus on my self care. Using homemade formula has risks and would defeat the purpose of the choice I have made for myself and my child as it would take far more of my precious time and energy than either breastfeeding or formula feeding would.

      Formula is a safe option for babies, and I’m so glad that I and my son have access to it so we can have a more enjoyable (and restful) life and relationship.

  4. I’m a big fan of Baby’s Only Organic Dairy Formula. I’ve been using it for a couple of months with success. In addition, it is really nice that it doesn’t have that “formula” smell to it!

    • I bought some of that on Amazon and have used it mixed in baby food but he didn’t like it for bottles. I’m trying to use it up by mixing it into the Gerber in small amounts just to be rid of it. I love Gerber soothe and don’t feel like it smells at all!

  5. Amanda Hill

    Aprille, I am way behind in reading but I just saw this. I am so glad you wrote this! As the bread winner of the family AND the mom I had to return to work fairly quickly so I made the decision early on to not breastfeed. I introduced solids to my child around 5 months and she quickly developed a taste for actual food. At 2, she has a diverse palette and there is no vegetable or fruit she’ll turn away. I can put anything in front of her and she’ll try it. I know all children are different but I have faith that Little Brother will be just fine. As long as your children are fed, who cares how it’s ‘delivered’.

    • Absolutely. Little Brother is doing GREAT on formula and his appetite for table food is insatiable! He’s growing leaps and bounds and completely happy and healthy! I am even more thrilled with my decision to formula feed now than I was a month ago. We are still nursing here and there which is nice too, but formula is his primary food source now.

  6. Colleen G

    I breastfed both my girls until they were 2. I was the one who talked my friend into continuing breastfeeding her son even though she needed Gallbladder surgery while he was tiny. Then I had four boys and developed Fibromyalgia. My body refused to produce enough milk. I had bought into the La Leche League myth that milk supply issues do not really exist. So I got to the point of my son losing weight and refusing to unlatch all-night-long!
    I love formula. I love bottles. My boys were just as healthy as babies as my girls were. They are all fine now. By letting myself use formula I was able to work around my health problems to actually enjoy my babies. I had resented my son every time he demanded to nurse before I knew he was genuinely hungry as all he wanted to do was nurse.
    There should not be battles about feeding babies.

    • Colleen, I love stories like this. I hate that so many moms have to learn it the hard way and get to a breaking point like this. However, I am glad that you did learn the lesson and do what’s best for you and your baby. I so wish more moms realized how truly born out of proportion this issue is! It really breaks my heart to see my former self and so many other moms refuse to give in to something that will make their life so much easier and actually help them have a more healthy relationship with their baby. Don’t get me wrong – I love and support breastfeeding. I just love and support formula feeding just as much.

Leave a Reply