Three and a half days

Three and a half days. How can he change so much in three and a half days?

His diction is clearer and his sentences more complex. His hair is longer, he is taller, and his body is fuller. He says words not before heard and recites a book I didn’t know he had learned.

He is beautiful and he is mine.

I feel his warmth as his tiny body melts into my arms. I feel relief in his frame – an exhale.

He can’t express his frustrations and hurts and confusion. All he knows is mommy was gone and all was not right in his world, but now she is home and he can let go.

The water spills on his bed – wet and cold – and he is undone. His confusion comes out in tears and sobs and burying himself in my hair because it’s the only thing that makes him feel like anything makes sense.

Then the sheets are changed, the blankets are snuggled around him, and sleepily muffled words come out of his mouth. “Chinny chin chin” marks their end. I just smile because they make no sense, but they don’t have to.

A good night’s sleep for us both and tomorrow is a new day, a day that starts with mommy and ends with mommy. And maybe tomorrow, his world will make sense again.

_____

I wrote this down last night after returning from the three and a half days I spent at Allume. It’s so good to be home with my family!