21 Comments

  1. Hey momma. This is such an important place to be! I will pray for you as you navigate it. And pray for moments, and words of redemption and grace. So good to see you.

  2. sierravbrock

    Aprille, I LOVE this! I look forward to what you will write, how you will change the way in which you write, the abounding grace that you will be able to tell as a result of living the life God has given you! I am personally SO excited about this. I loved this post. A great reminder for me & you can count on me clicking on just about all of the posts you write from here on out. (I usually read what you write anyway!) 🙂

    • Thank you so much Sierra. It’s nice to know that people will be reading along. I have no idea what the future will be like for this blog but I am excited for it.

  3. Aprille, these questions aren’t easy to stare down, to face head-on. But that’s what you’re doing. I’m so proud of you. This is brave, brave stuff, right here – to consider how you’ve been handling others’ stories and realize there may be a more loving way…. Just so beautiful, how you’re letting Him shape your heart, shape you as a writer and a human. Love you sister.

  4. Beautifully said, my friend! I like the reminder that good intentions are not enough.
    Blogging has opened up this world of immediate response rather than marinating on words and letting them sit. I love the idea of honoring others through our words and finding ways for our words to be empowering. Great thoughts! Looking forward to what God continues to work in your heart.

  5. stacy

    These are all very valid questions/ thoughts that need to be considered. Just make sure that whatever you decided, it is what YOU have decided based on what is best for you and your family, not based on what some speaker at a conference said. If real-life-people don’t know how to handle your ‘mess hanging out’ – love the way you put that 🙂 it doesn’t necessarily mean it is your fault. If people get hurt by what you say, it doesn’t necessarily mean there is fault with what you said.There could be, but there also could not be. 🙂 There are two sides to every coin. I find that in life, especially in certain types of churches, many people don’t want to deal with the real life messes, or they want to, but are afraid to make themselves vulnerable for fear of being seen as unspiritual and weak and looked down upon by people that they have been taught to respect. In church or out of church, sometimes things that people haven’t experienced themselves or aren’t familiar with, they just don’t understand and can be prone to judge. They are human too. Things like adrenal fatigue are seen as laziness and lack of willpower, when actually it was probably a very strong does of willpower that caused the adrenal fatigue to begin with. Things like child behavior problems, especially when their is no glaring disability or diagnosis, can be seen as bad parenting, when just the opposite is most likely true. We all need to be constantly evaluating our situations in life and changing as we see fit. Absolutely take a step back and decide for yourself what you want your blog to be. Decide what is best for your family and go for it! We’re all learning as we go. 🙂

    • Stacy: what wisdom here in your comment.

      I think that these are questions that I’ve actually been ruminating on for a while, well over a year now. So I don’t plan on changing the way I blog based on what a conference speaker said, but rather more on things I’ve been thinking through a lot lately.

      There is such a fine line between respecting others while you tell your story and becoming a people pleaser in your writing (and general living). I don’t know where those lines are for me yet. I think I spent the majority of my life being a people pleaser (see This Post for more on that), so for the last 2 years I’ve been really pushing back against that. But I wonder if I’ve gone to far in it all? Again, I don’t have the answers. And the last thing I want to do is to keep from saying what God wants me to say for sake of pleasing people, or TO say things that I shouldn’t for sake of pleasing people.

      As you mentioned, just because people get hurt doesn’t mean I’m at fault. The truth can hurt.

      Thank you so much for your encouragement. I really loved your comment.

  6. When I heard you ask that question after Esther’s session that day, I suspected you would come to this place. It is a hard yet beautiful place to be. I respect you in asking and attempting to answer these questions. That is one thing that Allume reminded me as well this year – to let the story marinate and soak and perhaps after I have savored it, I can better tell it. Too, there are times when you just need to tell it in the raw, here and now. I will be praying for you as you navigate these tender areas. <3 love to you!

    • “let the story marinate and soak and perhaps after I have savored it, I can better tell it”

      Yes…I love that! And thanks for sitting with me in that session! It was not at all what I expected but it was so thought-provoking that it really stuck with me, probably more than any other session!

  7. “Heal first. Seek Christ and HIS redemption for the hard parts of your story. THEN, write, honoring those in the wake . . . ” Yep, this, *this* is the word I needed to hear. Thank you, Aprille. Praying for you (and all us writers) as we wrestle this out. Love you, friend. xo

  8. I love so much about this post Aprille. I didn’t attend the session you are referring to, but have had similar thoughts in the past. I had to completely take a break from blogging for a long time to refresh and decide where I wanted to go with it, and even if the Lord still wanted me to blog. I think that is a side of blogging people don’t see.

    That being said, I think it is SO important for us to use our writing as ministry. I can talk to people in person, but may not be able to really share my thoughts as easily as I do through writing. Yes, it is important to be real with real people, but I also think we need to share our thoughts, and our feelings as writers in a way that can minister to others. For me, that is through my blog, for others it may be through a friendship, or as a speaker, or in a book. You write beautifully and I know the Lord can use your words to minister to others.

    Blogging also causes us to share things that maybe shouldn’t always be shared, or that maybe can be done more gently. I understand that concern. This is really hard, and I think it is very important to ask those we know if we can share their stories on our blog. Any time I write about marriage I have my husband read it first. I want to respect him. I don’t remember which speaker it was but they said their husband was upset because he learned something about them on her blog. I hope I never do that, but I can see how that could easily happen. I also think it is important to ask our kids permission before posting things to any social media platform. We need to respect those around us, and I think all bloggers struggle with that aspect.

    Prayers to you as you work through this. I look forward to reading what comes next 🙂

  9. letwhylead

    Wow. SO much to think about here. I’m re-inspired to write with vulnerability AND perspective and to be gentle with others whose stories intersect mine. Thanks, Aprille. Best wishes in this journey!

  10. “The more vulnerable I am in my online space the more disconnect I feel with the face-to-face interactions, because now I don’t know how to live any other way but raw and vulnerable..”

    Yes< yes. I understand.

Leave a Reply