This is the moment everything up til this moment formed into this realization of healing. Because not once during the last few days had I been triggered. Not one hymn. Not one shudder induced by a smell or a sight. No anger. No pain. No regret. Just genuine gratitude and bittersweet joy for my family, for my grandma’s prayers, for the good old hymns, for each and every last memory.
I received the following message from a former acquaintance recently: What advice would you give someone preparing to step out of a IFB, Legalistic Church? I sent this person a bit of advice over messenger, but as I thought about it a bit more, I felt like it would be apropos to include a post of … [Read more…]
Written on April 30, 2015 23 Weeks, 1 day Last week I realized that I didn’t remember what the pain felt like. I know it was bad and there was screaming, but it’s a blur, and I have no physiological memory of it. All that changed last night. I had a nightmare. I was at … [Read more…]
Music was one of the most instrumental things that provided comfort, healing, and hope for me during my pregnancy and birth. I started looking for songs for my playlist in the first trimester. By second trimester, I had all of the songs on my phone, in a Youtube pregnancy and labor playlist, and burned to … [Read more…]
This is why our entire family needs whitespace. We need space and time for rest and healing. We need to slow down and catch up with everything life has thrown our way.
The hurts and pains upon our hearts make us cry and whimper and we just want it to be all better. But healing takes time.