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I feel the need to blog this morning, and I have no idea why. Right now I find myself entirely frustrated with life. I am in no mood to encourage anyone, but I guess God wants me to write this anyway.
I was awoken shortly before seven this morning (after being up until after midnight last night talking with my sweet husband), by again, the sweet husband. Although this time I was having to remind myself of his sweetness, as I’m sure he was of me. We got into an argument, well more like a tense discussion. The subject doesn’t really matter, as it was very minuscule and it was resolved. So then we are trying to “make up” which kinda takes a while sometimes cuz we are both so down-and-out from our own shortcomings and how we could and should have done things differently.
Then the computer starts acting up. us.army.mil is a broken link…hmmm, interesting. Every time I log in, say 3 sentences, and then I lose communication with the STUPID server. (Can you tell I’m happy about this?)
Now he is gone…maybe he got frustrated and gave up too. I want to just say forget it, but I know he has an hour and a half left of work and I’m thinking he might TRY to get back on so I should at least keep trying to stay on just in case.
I just don’t understand God sometimes…why, when this is the ONLY sunny day we’ve had this week, did my last day with my family have to start with a “tense discussion”, computer issues, and an unfinished making-up discussion and conversation? As I wrote on FB, isn’t deployment rough enough without dealing with this kind of stuff?
A good friend of mine told me that the month before homecoming would be tense…she was right.
The last few days I’ve been taking a little bit different view of God…kinda looking for Him in places I didn’t see him before. Maybe this is one of those situations that He is orchestrating for some very strange reason beyond my human comprehension.
So I’m looking, and thinking….”Okay God, what is up today? What great lessons to I need to learn?”
My mom sent me this email with weird pictures that say “Today is International Disturbed People’s Day”….okay, yeah, that would be me. DEFINITELY disturbed…
Then underneath it said: “Every sixty seconds you spent angry, upset, or mad is one full minute of happiness you’ll never get back.”
So I guess my answer from God is that I’m not supposed to let this, in my husband’s vernacular “sucky morning” ruin my day that, (according to the sunshine outside) should be filled with happiness.
All right God…I’ll try not to be angry. I’ll try to enjoy this day cuz I know you want me to.